I ask my five year old daughter Alyssa “Do you want some macaroni and cheese with that?”

“No.”

I clarify. “Are you sure you don’t want some Mac and cheese? Because–“

Alyssa cuts in. “Daddy, I said NO! PERIOD. END OF STORY!!”

The next ten minutes are spent explaining to Alyssa that she is the child, not the parent, and while Mommy and Daddy might say “END OF STORY” sometimes when Alyssa isn’t listening, she cannot, or she risks very bad mojo.

Oh, and loooong timeouts.

Her reaction? “Oh. OK. No problem.”

My daughter is five going on twenty-five.